Tuesday, February 05, 2008

Terps at BC on ESPNU = Awww, Man!

There's a phrase that comes out of my mouth unconsciously at certain moments in my otherwise charmed (not really) life: "Awww, man!"

I usually say "awww, man" when I get ketchup on my shirt, which is about 30-35 percent of the time that I use ketchup.

Awww, man moments are those moments when something suddenly becomes apparent that you don't like, but have to deal with. It's not a complete disaster worthy of a stream of obscenities, but it's something you're just kinda bummed out about.

The sudden realization factor is a big part of this. In my book, "awww, man" happens when you think everything is going according to plan... you're just eating your french fries, enjoying the dipping and the dining, when all of a sudden out of your peripheral vision you catch a hint of red, and you think to yourself, "does this shirt have red in it?" and you don't think it does, but you don't want to look down, but you know you gotta... "awww, man!" There it is, a big gloopy buzzkill.

Other Awww, Man moments
  • When you are in a hurry to get somewhere, scramble out to your car in the morning and the front windshield is iced over = Awww, man.
  • When your computer crashes and you don't think you've hit save yet = Awww, man.
  • 30 seconds AFTER you finish a "meal" from McDonald's = Awww, man (this one sometimes followed by, 'why did I do THAT?")
  • When you get in bed, all snuggly and ready for sleep and your five-month-old starts crying and your wife looks at you with that "can you please deal with him?" = AWWW MAN!
  • When you buy a bookshelf from Target -- you know the ones where the back panel is a piece of cardboard made to look like wood from 40 yards away -- and you put the whole thing together, and then you tap in 135 small nails around the perimeter to seal the faux wood background, and just as you are completing the tap, tap, tapping process and feeling good about actually putting something together that required the use of tools ... you realize you put the thing on backwards = AWWW MAN!
  • When you get to the trailer outside of the yet-to-be-opened Comcast Center, and you've been sitting in great seats in Cole for the last 4 years because you got a hook-up from a former colleague, but you've only been paying $125 in TerpClub donations the last four years, and you know you're gonna get screwed, and then they walk you over to this big board and show you the remaining seats you can pick from, and the only ones left are in the deep recesses of each of the corners.... you know what's coming... Awww.... Actually, I think I said F...

Anyway, why am I bringing up all these "awww, man" moments? Well, this Wednesday night's Maryland at BC game is on TV alright, but it's on ESPNU. And I have Comcast cable, which means I don't get ESPNU. And by now I think you can guess my reaction when I found out this news:

AWWW, MAN!!

This is criminal. Terps are on a roll, BC is reeling, Md needs the win, Osby is playing like a man possessed, Gary has these guys believing, Hayes is stepping up to can open 3s, etc., etc., etc. and I have a TV that gets like 500 channels but one of them is not ESPNU.

My choices, if I want to watch the game, are to go over to a friend's house who has DirectTV or to a bar. More likely, I won't see it, because it's on at 7 which is a hard time to completely ignore your family, so I would otherwise record it and watch it later, but I can't do that. AWWW Man, man, man!

Do people in DC have ESPNU? How can Maryland do this to us? Aren't we in the era when it should be rather easy to see every ACC game?

I actually called Comcast cable tonight to see if I could buy some sort of delux sports package that includes ESPNU. But it's not that I'm not paying for it, it's simply not available via Comcast. Is this ESPN's way of trying to get a grassroots movement going to add "The U" (please) to Comcast's lineup?

I am willing to do a lot of stupid things, but complain about the need for a fifth (seventh?) ESPN channel on my cable lineup ain't one of them.

What to do, what to do. Well, give it to me straight Johnny Holiday, I can take it. But in the back of my mind I'll be thinking, AWWW MAN!

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hey man...I'm with you 100%! I'm so sick of this marriage between the Terps and the "U". I'm not missing this game by any stretch but it's a huge inconvenience to have to go out to watch it.

Anonymous said...

Yup - but just another reason to get out for a few on a Wed. night if you can.... Man I hope my wife lets me!
Go Terps!